9/23/2008

Mother's Conflict Addendum

After pondering this for a bit, I think I know what it is. I want my son to depend on me like he did when he was a little guy, just as my Mother wishes that we were home again under her wing...

Yeah...

9/19/2008

A Mother's Conflict

This Morning, I was trying to confide to a friend of my conflicting emotions on being a Mother. I suddenly got all emotional and teary-eyed whilst writing and had to change the subject. You see, The Boy is seventeen, a Senior, very eager to go out into the World, leave his mark in it, and serve his country. I was telling her how proud, excited and scared this all made me feel. How it was very evident that my partner and I have raised him to be a responsible (somewhat... he still forgets to turn in his homework at times) and caring young man, but when I see him, all I can think of is how badly I want my little boy back. Now, getting all weepy and emotional at work just won't do, but now in the comfort of home I guess I can type this and hope my tears don't fall too close to the laptop and electrocute myself.

How does a Mother really deal with a child going off on their own?

As a young adult I left my parents house for the Navy. I did not have the benefit of watching my Mom deal with her first-born leave home, and now that I am going through the very same thing, I am having a hard time dealing with it. While I deal with this I feel like crap because I have not been very sympathetic towards my Mom when she says that she wishes her kids weren't so far away. So perhaps I should treat my Mom with more compassion... it just might help me deal with what I am going through now.

So maybe this isn't really about The Boy leaving home, but about taking an introspective look at the relationship I have with my parents. Perhaps by being more intimate and confiding with them, I will get a clue or cues on how to deal with my eldest leaving home.

Hmmm...